School Holidays Depression

For some reason whenever it is the school holidays, there is a lingering feeling of sadness during the two weeks. I don't like the false sense of a 'holiday.' As a grade 12 student, they name the two weeks of rest as a 'study break', meaning you still have to study during that break. Rather than a break from study.

Two weeks seems too short: the first week going by fast, the second coming too quickly.

The Expectation To Do Work

In the real world, when given a holiday from your job, do you have to do work?

No! The job of a student seems worse than any kind. No pay. No choice.

"All for your education!" It's a bullshit excuse.

Alas, it's impossible to change the rules of the game, so you might as well play and win it. Then there are those who choose to not play at all.

School is a game after all. Nearly anything in life is a game. The objective? Pass through all year levels successfully. The next objective? Achieving the desired ATAR to enter a university course. How to play? Study. Shut up and listen in class. When given a large amount of free time, use it effectively for your own benefit.

That's why they expect you to work during your holidays. It was a prerequisite for the game. It will soon be Term 3, and most exams and assignments will be due towards the start of the term. The holiday was a buffer between mandatory class work and choice to focus on areas of improvement.

This is also an opportunity to get massive amounts of work done. To be in a better position than what you were expected to be in. Why? Instead of rushing with your work, time can be in your favour.

We have seen this kind of student: the one who leaves it to the last minute. Hell, we've all been that student before.

Is it a matter of trying to trick ourselves into work? The true nature of work: something that must be done. There should be no emotion when deciding whether or not to do. If we are more concerned by how entertained or unhappy we were doing the work, it won't be done at all.

That leads to my next question, should we like the school work we are doing? No. It doesn't matter how you feel about it; you should feel indifferent. School is a necessary evil as a part of life. The work demanded should be met with no emotion.

"Well, I want to feel something."

I'm only learning recently that anger is a potent emotion to help cause action.

Take for example my Maths Methods class. Nearly half failed their last exam. The reactions from these results were strange, strange enough to have my Math teacher verbally say it out loud. There was laughter and people aloof to their results: E's and D's. It's quite cliché, but our teacher wasn't angry, she was disappointed.

The students weren't getting angry over their results though. Perhaps that is why there is such inaction within our academics? You can either work regardless to how you feel about the work, or be angry at the work not being done and doing it yourself.

How many do the hard work, especially when they don't feel like it? Or is it a matter of the game being played not blessing them in their favour. Because if you ask a high performing academic her opinion on the game, she'll say nothing ill spoken about it other than its nature of being mandatory. However, she has already accepted the fact there is no way around not going to school, it has been put into law.

Instead of complaining, she complies. That is the simplest explanation of the game of the school system. Do what is asked of you, and you shall reap the rewards. And what are those rewards? Passing? Receiving a standardised and formal education? Or the fact we were able to play within a set of rules and benefit from it?

In life, sometimes we need to do some things we don't enjoy. Learning is one of those processes. Sure, you can be inquisitive and curious with your work. In order to progress, there will be work that must be done that is not very enjoyable. Does that mean giving up on passion? Is that the ultimate lesson of school? No.

Learning to act without the need for passion or emotion. Now that is a skill you need for success.

Where Does This Depression Come From?

When I use this word in the context of school holidays, the intended meaning is the feeling of solace and melancholy.

Perhaps this feeling comes from knowing the end of this break is nearing soon. The two weeks of freedom we have is closing in. No longer we can sleep in, or choose our schedule on our own terms. Having to face the reality of being in the system again for another term.

I am enjoying the days of rest, but I'd rather get these weeks of school done so I am not allured to the false sense of free time. These two weeks is just enough for the student to get back to work. It provides the best opportunity to rest from all the academics. Doing six different fields of work is tiring.

With the 6 hours of my life free for 10 days, I was able to get work done in terms of both school and the personal brand.

Now coming back to school, I no longer feel it. Progress is being made when going through school. The holidays seemed to prolong the inevitable of completing the work. Why try and prolong the inevitable?

True Freedom

My life will only truly begin after I graduate high school. My dreams are left on hold for some certificate of education. If the holidays were a time to progress than to rest, perhaps this feeling of depression would not exist.

However, as soon as I entered my first class back from the holidays, it went away. We can go back into the offence of getting school work done. Each assignment separate battles from each other. Winning the war is ticking each box the curriculum burdens us like a battle of attrition. Waiting for the end of our schooling days.

School is unfortunate for those who have an idea of what pathway they want to take. A blessing for those who are still unsure on what success or purpose they want to pursue.

Doing school work fills a void, that is, called being a student.